Is Yelling the new Spanking?

Tools

By Jen Christensen

Story Published: Nov 1, 2009 at 8:33 PM CDT

Story Updated: Nov 1, 2009 at 8:33 PM CDT

How many times a week do you yell at your kids? Some experts say yelling is the new spanking. Many parents these days have chosen not to spank after several studies showing it causes psychological damage. Does yelling do the same thing? Take a look at the latest article and share your thoughts y clicking on related content.

Tuesday, Nov 3 at 11:31 AM ALB wrote ...

To Agent #12937689, Paula Schnifer. What a joke dcfs does not do a thing! i know a women who has had them called on her 4 or 5 times and nothing has been done, the kids are still there your soultion is counseling which has altready been done and has not worked! dcfs is a flippin joke!

Tuesday, Nov 3 at 11:22 AM ALB wrote ...

Are u kiddin me, spanking a child does not mean they will end up in prison! my god people grow up

Tuesday, Nov 3 at 1:55 AM Sue wrote ...

My brother was spanked when a kid and was determined not to spank his children [which he didn't]. He got into trouble once or twice [trespassing] but never arrested. His kid ended up being the ring leader in a bully gang at school.

Monday, Nov 2 at 9:06 PM dont hit wrote ...

if you spank you are a terrible parent. end of story. i was the only son out of six that wasn't spanked. The five before me have all done jail time. spank your child and they are likely to go to prison...

Monday, Nov 2 at 5:47 PM Dad wrote ...

"Some experts say yelling is the new spanking." Who are these experts? There's no such things as an expert in child rearing. If we want your advice we'll ask for it.

Monday, Nov 2 at 5:30 PM Jon wrote ...

What good does Yelling or a time out do ? There nothing wrong with a spank on the bottom when needed ....

Monday, Nov 2 at 4:52 PM No Hit wrote ...

My sister and I were hit and beat with a belt when we were children. I chose to not spank my child and have a wonderful, polite, smart, obedient 15 year old. My sister went against her better judgment and hit her children - one is now a 10 year old just admitted to a psychiatric hospital for violent behavior, the other is a 7 year old with social problems. When you start to hit your child where do you draw the line? How much is enough? Why not try leading by example instead of raising a hand?

Monday, Nov 2 at 4:04 PM Beaucheckers wrote ...

Anyone want to guess when schools started to get out of control? 'Bout the time we took away corporal punishment. Got a few swats myself but it was more the threat of a swat that kept me in line. Can't even threaten the little monsters now and they know it!@

Monday, Nov 2 at 2:58 PM amused wrote ...

Paula....amused to see how msinformed you are. A waste of time to read actully. DCFS does not contact adults alleged to be abused as children...or log email addresses...you have to have names, addresses and specific allegations to report. Halloween is over.

Monday, Nov 2 at 2:54 PM 3BMomma wrote ...

Just a thought- if there is so much supporting evidence of us all being so psychologically damaged from the "old" ways- why do I not remember EVER fearing going to school- be it grade or high school? Our naughty kids got the paddle. No one was afraid to come back to school out of fear of the princple. Now our babies are afraid to go because of other CHILDREN. We are a pathetic nation.

Monday, Nov 2 at 2:50 PM 3BMomma wrote ...

Yelling is never effective in training children. It's for the adult, who has forgotten they are the parent and do have the right to control the child. However, when we've been "big brothered" for so long and left to feel we have no power because just about everything we do will damage a child, no wonder so many of us resort to yelling! Spanking is not a crime, when it is administered in love and in control, not anger. There is a difference between physical abuse and a disciplinary spanking

Monday, Nov 2 at 2:20 PM Cathy wrote ...

I think it is wrong to hit a child. I don't think inflicting pain on a child is a way to disipline. Yelling is not the answer, either. I know, I would not want someone hitting me, or yelling in my face. There are other ways to discipline. What they need is more love, hugs, and encouragement. I never hit my children, and they are good, sweet, and well behaved as they have gotten older. Show by example! Pay more attention to your kids. Get involved.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:49 PM Chris wrote ...

Yelling is not a disciplinary tactic, neither is spanking. There is a point (happened to me) where the child becomes "immune" to both. Yelling and spankings are "attention getters" Then again, not always needed. Oh sure, I use both when the timing is right. But honestly, if I have to yell or spank my son; it's when he's pushed a situation far as he can (conscious effort on his part) and he needs to know how serious I really am. I was spanked, my dad yelled. It's better than some alternatives.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:38 PM snakedr wrote ...

A spanking every once in a while is not a bad thing. My kids need a reminder spanking so they will stay on task. Once they are off task and talked to about it over and over, then it's time for a spanking. They get back on task for a while, then they get off task, reminder spanking...back on task. Its a cycle and it works especially for school.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:37 PM mari wrote ...

my mother raised twelve children and i was never spanked i would get time outs and my nose in a corner and if i was really bad a cup of water always did the trick

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:29 PM ChewyBees wrote ...

One thing in favor of yelling is that we are a short time away from the materialistic rug being pulled out, and when that happens, we all better be ready for a great deal of stress, including our children. Fairy tale America is going bye-bye, and if you deny this you are going to be finished when it happens. Dr. Spock's Drug and Hug guide to parenting is not going to prepare the children of our nation for the future their forefathers created.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:14 PM ChewyBees wrote ...

The problem with yelling is that most of the time it is laden with expletives and hysterical outbursts. It is the adult version of a temper tantrum. When I raise my voice, you better believe it's an ID of the problem and what's going to heppen immediately to rectify it. Spanking has become a useful warning, as my kids know exactly what that is all about. The best way to discipline is to take away their fun stuff if they refuse to obey, and then stick with it.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:14 PM N wrote ...

I was spanked/hit as a child. Not all parents are rational when they hit children. Being hit when you do something wrong in the eyes of an irrational parent screws you up. I wish we could have had a rational conversation and talked things out. I do believe hitting your child is a way of relieving yourself of being upset instead of teaching them the difference between right and wrong. It's like telling your child when someone does something you don't like, it's okay to be violent.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:11 PM anonymous wrote ...

Technically spanking is not legally considered abuse, so Paula, whoever you really are you are wrong. According to DCFS as long as you do not leave a mark you are legally allowed to spank your child. If you are going to impersonate an official officer of the courts maybe you should know what you are talking about first?

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:54 PM TCox wrote ...

This is crazy. I am a young mother of two ages 2 and 4. I was spanked as needed as a child will no long term affects and I will continue to apply the same to my children. Spanking is not the only answer, but there is no way that I will allow my children to behave the way others do. And if you do not get them to understand and repect you by teenage years there is not a whole lot you can do. We inforce structure and keep them involved in church so to those of u that are against spanking =P

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:50 PM Amy wrote ...

This is addressed to Paula, I am a graduate of MTHS and MGS. The principle of MGS had a paddle with the holes drilled in that was was used to swat. Are you going to arrest the school official who used this discipline too? By the way, it worked. No one got out of line too often and we had no school shootings. There is a differance between disciplin and abuse. DCFS try governing your foster homes where children are often neglected and abused.

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:26 PM anonymous wrote ...

use a 2x4

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:18 PM GMOM wrote ...

All yelling does is teach the child to yell back!!

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:09 PM Michelle wrote ...

I was spanked as a child, I turned out just fine. So did my brothers and sisters, I come from a large blended family. Eight of us in total when we were all together, my mom could take us all to a restaurant to eat without driving all the other patrons out. I'm sorry but I watch my nephews run all over my sister and brother-in-law, those two NEED a good spanking cause yelling does nothing but make them laugh and do it again!

Monday, Nov 2 at 11:52 AM fed up wrote ...

dear paula threats like you just left are why there are so many disrespectful kids now kids need discipline there is a difference between spanking and abuse

Monday, Nov 2 at 11:48 AM Rod wrote ...

Spanking is not abuse when used in the correct manner. My Father spanked me and my brothers. My older brother is a doctor, I work in law enforcement, and my younger brother is a master at home remodeling. Even though my rear hurt at the time, I am now grateful that they cared enough to discipline me.

Monday, Nov 2 at 11:48 AM muzzy wrote ...

dear paula, come on over. and i will give you what i give my kids when they got out of line

Monday, Nov 2 at 11:45 AM momofboyz wrote ...

What a scam!! Is that a threat to these people who are entitled to their opinion on spanking?? Agent #12937689, Paula Schnifer

Monday, Nov 2 at 11:14 AM Agent #12937689, Paula Schnifer wrote ...

Official Message From Agent #12937689: I regret to inform you that those of you who have just admitted to striking your child have been reported to the DCFS. Your IP addresses have been logged and someone from the agency will be in contact with you shortly. To those of you that were struck as a child: Our agency will be in contact with you to see if further action needs to be taken. Thank you for you time.

Monday, Nov 2 at 10:59 AM KungFu-AliFight wrote ...

Send your kids to Sonny Couch. That guy is much more severe than a spanking and 500x more effective than any type of talking/screaming/taking their video games away type of action could ever get you. www.catchingdo.com

Monday, Nov 2 at 10:37 AM muzzy wrote ...

melynn. when they took discipline away from the parents and school"s this where we lost control of today kid"s. i was disciplined and to the day my father passed away i would not even think of back talking him or be dis-respectful of him. todays kids have none of this

Monday, Nov 2 at 10:01 AM fedup wrote ...

I was spanked as a child and learned my lesson. I didn't like it at the time but have since realized I more than deserved it. Does spanking work with every child. The answer to that is no of course not. Would it help a majority of the kids these days? Yes it would. They are so unruly and obnoxious and parents can't or choose not to do anything out of fear. I go to places listen/watch kids rant throw tantrums and get away with it. It rather sad in this society kids have the power over parents.

Monday, Nov 2 at 10:00 AM Aaron wrote ...

Myself and those of my friends that were spanked were the most well behaved and respectful kids growing up and are to this day. Spankings and discipline establish the hierarchy that needs to be present for a well functioning parent/child relationship. It's worked for centuries, but people like Melynn scream and cry over it and make it seem like it's all abuse. In most cases, one good swat gets the point across. I, like others, will not argue that sometimes there is abuse, but most times not.

Monday, Nov 2 at 9:36 AM Melynn wrote ...

spanking never hurt anyone? How about the child? Where does spanking fit into the discipline of a child? What are you teaching by hitting. Next time, they just don't get caught. Spanking is usually a result of a temper tantrum from an adult.

Monday, Nov 2 at 9:32 AM Eric wrote ...

Either way - A little common sense in each situation is needed. Raye, obviously you have a different sitch than most. The bottom line - we all know that spanking is looked down on,yes, both yelling and spanking can be abusive if used too often. Parents today are so busy with their own agendas that they are not consistent in discipline. You are responsible for your actions and the consequences for those actions. Teach your children to show some respect and don't allow control you and your home.

Monday, Nov 2 at 9:15 AM muzzy wrote ...

lynn, it is your line of thinking is the big problem with the young kids today.. they have zero respect for anything or anyone. if they deserve a good swat give it to them. it never hurt anyone

Monday, Nov 2 at 8:51 AM Raye wrote ...

ok let me ask u this did u like getting slapped or spanked my son has bipolar Adhd and anxiety should i slap or spank him everytime because he acts out some kids dont know how to control it i try to remove things he enjoys that to me is the best way to handle it

Monday, Nov 2 at 8:15 AM judeerie wrote ...

My step-son and wife will not spank or yell and they have a child so spoiled I hate for them to come visit. He is 4 and we are only allowed to redirect his attention. The little devil could use a good spank now and then.

Monday, Nov 2 at 7:53 AM KJ wrote ...

Lynn, I'm sure your kids are just peaches. Treat them like adults and maybe someday soon they'll be tried as one...

Monday, Nov 2 at 7:17 AM Get Real wrote ...

Spanking is Not Abuse. Letting your kids get away with doing wrong is Lazy and Neglectful.

Monday, Nov 2 at 7:06 AM Mom in Blm wrote ...

Yelling doesn't work but spanking does if done correctly. My kids get spanks when they do something I consider to be dangerous that could cause harm to themselves or someone else. I yell sometimes to but usually it doesn't work so I have tried to quit the yelling. Even more effective is take away all their computer games, I have taken the cords away several times so they can't play games too. This works for awhile.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:47 AM Lynn wrote ...

Yelling is just as abusive as spanking. Parents who spank and yell repeatedly instead of addressing the behavior with calm and common sense are just LAZY! These parents don't want to spend the time and energy required to required to raise well-adjusted children.

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:35 AM Lynn wrote ...

Yelling is just as abusive as spanking and shouldn't be used unless in a dangerous situation - to keep them from getting harmed. The parents who yell/spank are the ones who don't pay enough attention to their chilren. they are LAZY!

Monday, Nov 2 at 1:29 AM Lynn wrote ...

I don't believe in spanking, it teaches violent behavior and children are bombarded with enough of that through the media, games, etc. Misbehaving children are trying to tell their parents something. Maybe if parents didn't use video games and TV as baby sitters and spent more time getting to know their children and connecting with them there wouldn't be the behavioral problems that "require" spanking. I was never hit or spanked and I didn't do it to my children who are now in college.

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:43 AM Cissy wrote ...

I was spanked and im fine. Some of the kids i have seen need a good spanking.Parents have had there rights taken away.

Monday, Nov 2 at 12:20 AM Jason wrote ...

I myself was not spanked as a child, but i did spank my child from 20 months old until the age of 4, and i haven't spanked him since. He remains the best behaved child in his class, or so says his teacher. A spanking that isn't overboard is an effective form of correction. Never out of anger and always in moderation.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 11:41 PM yes wrote ...

am i the only one who got slapped as a child? how are they ever going to learn with yelling, yelling causes more drama. im not saying to beat your child, im saying slapping and spanking are completely different and an acceptable form of punishment.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 11:05 PM Chris wrote ...

I like the term above beat my kid..Hello Mother of the year

Sunday, Nov 1 at 10:48 PM Nic wrote ...

Spare the rod and you'll spoil the child... These days 'others' would have you dope your kid out on pills, than take a firm hand to the problem. It's Ridiculous!

Sunday, Nov 1 at 10:46 PM Paul wrote ...

I see so many misbehaving kids that need one good swat which will stop that behavior. It is pathetic to watch two to six year old children in control of their parents. Those who came up with that conclusion of psychological damage are the ones with the impairment.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 10:15 PM suzie wrote ...

Spankings never hurt me any or my child; I can't believe how many misbehaved children there are in this world today and spankings sure would help them behave more at home and at school.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 10:00 PM Cody wrote ...

I was spanked as a kid. Really I have seen no psychlogical effect. I get yelled at all the time. It's just words. They don't hurt the kids.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 9:13 PM Debbie wrote ...

and the problem these days is the kids know if you do spank them all they have to do is pick up the phone and report you...is sad. No child likes to be spanked but there is a difference between discipline and abuse.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 9:11 PM Debbie wrote ...

got more than my share with a belt from dad and switch from my mom...did it make me hate them.... no way it made me respect them and truth be known I should have gotten a few I didn't.

Sunday, Nov 1 at 9:03 PM Josephis wrote ...

I am not afraid to beat my child if he steps out of line! Parents these days have become too soft.

Add a comment

Name:

Comment: 1000 Characters Left

WEEK News 25 - and its affiliated companies are not responsible for the content of comments posted or for anything arising out of use of the above comments or other interaction among the users. We reserve the right to screen, refuse to post, remove or edit user-generated content at any time and for any or no reason in our absolute and sole discretion without prior notice, although we have no duty to do so or to monitor any Public Forum.

More Good Stuff

Advertisement
This content requires the latest Adobe Flash Player and a browser with JavaScript enabled. Click here for a free download of the latest Adobe Flash Player.

Stock Quotes

What's On TonightFull Schedule

Local Business Dir